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Ill again

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Looks like today I've woken up ill again, no editing today.

My dad did my chores this morning, but not because I'm ill or out of the kindness of his heart. He did it to prove that I'm lazy. I'm upset because my dad isn't even letting me do my own chores now, he assigned me to them but now does them to prove I'm lazy. How can I prove I'm not lazy if he does them? Its the same logic he used on me the other day, I had to clean the floor over something and as I filled the bucket of water up to do so, my dad said he was the only person who did anything to help in the house. I was washing the floor because he asked. I was angry and upset so left him to wash the floor, he accused me of trying to find an excuse to get out, no apologises for just upsetting me by insulting me!

The guy lives in a dream world!

He is telling me that he can go get a 1 bedroom ground floor flat any he time he wants when I know he is lying about that too! Theres a waiting list and he can't get it just like that. We had an argument this morning over him blackmailing me to keep me here. While its true he is lying over the 1 bedroom flat thing, he knows if me and my brother move out he doesn't warrent a 3 bedroom house anymore and thus he'll be moved out within a matter of months. Plus he wants me to stay here and get a suitable enough job (I'm getting in money not enough) to buy our current. I found out that in order to do so I've got to get his and my mother (who will be easy since she hasn't lived here for over a decade) names off the occupation list.

So in the porcess I'm upset and made even more ill then I was this morning, I could have done still worked on things before, now I'm just upset and sick. He doesn't even understand he is making me ill anyway. He just goes and says "see a doctor then", well in order to see a doctor today I'm going to have to take myself down the drop in doctor in my local town, which despite being local is arkward by bus because you have to wait for a bus that comes once an hour. Then wait around for 4 hours, which I had to do last time. If I book it in with my local doctor, on a friday thats Monday before I see her. By thenI've gotten over the illness normally. So what is the point??? I have a fever today, which is why I'm ill, he doesn't care, no one is ever allowed to be more ill then he is anyway!

It all seems so stupid because right now because though a month ago I tried to get out of my house then, but failed because things didn't go right. I'm not in the mood right now for anything let alone Vocaloid. My dad just goes on about how he feeds and keeps me for just £40, but screw that, that £40 isn't bringing me happiness! The last time I was truly happy I had a mother and a father at home anyway, he already scared off my mother.

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